Chaos Chess

Welcome to Chaos Chess!  This game is much like chess, but you can play any move, legal or not.  There are a couple very tiny rules to take into consideration:
1. Obey the forum rules.  
2. You don't have to sign up or anything, just make a move as the side you want to play as to join, whether it be White, Black, or a secret third party that doesn't exist yet.
3. Have fun :3

Turn 0:
The board is laid out.  Surely this will be a normal game of chess that won't end in a mess and a half.



White to move.

e4 :3

Turn 1a:
Looks like agedcheez has stepped up to represent the white team! To start, she has made a pretty by-the-book move.  Let's see how black responds.



Black to move.

Playing a game of strategy, are we? Jolly good. Black pawns, advance by 2 ranks.

Turn 1b:
Solar chooses to represent the Black side, advancing ALL EIGHT of his pawns to the 5th rank!  How will white respond to this?



White to move...?

Interesting gambit.
Bxb5

Turn 2a:
In response to Solar's move, agedcheez simply captures one of the pawns with its bishop, putting the king in check. Is there anything Solar can do to prevent this?



Black to move.

Can that little star-guy, the black one with the pommel hat on the light square, maybe step bottom right and block the other star guy from staring at me? It's making me uncomfortable being stared at like that

Turn 2b:
Honestly I almost interpreted that as king to f7 and not what it actually was: Bishop to d7. Glad I caught that before I messed up!



White to move (unless?)

Hmmm
Nc3 to protect my bishop

Turn 3a:
looks like agedcheez is deploying her knight to protect the bishop! Tensions are rising; who will break it first?



Black to move.

Tell the other starguy (dark-squared) and his little rabbit buddy to set up a farm below the starguy (dark-squared). If we're in a siege situation, we're going to need food to outlast the opponent.

Turn 3b:
Looks like Solar is having his pieces set up some farmland on f7! The farmhands seem to be doing a pretty good job too!



White to move (probably)

Oof, rookie mistake. Everyone knows that farms are not nearly as productive in the chalky, white soil of the light tiles. Nf3

Turn 4a:
The other knight is deployed! Also, that's just what the farmland piece looks like. yeah. Don't worry it's actually doing things.



Black to move.

The darksquare starguy below the other starguy, please!

Also I think you're confused. Farmland works best on dark squares if you're playing the, whatsitcalled, the one faction. But I'm playing the other one, the ones that love chalk, so while your farmland would be worse on chalk, mine actually works better because we eat chalkfruit. We literally love the chalky soil. (You can tell the faction by the color of the outline, I think. I've never played Chaos RTS before.)

Turn 4b:
Looks like Solar is attempting the dreaded Bishop Stack! Can so pull it off?



White to move? I dunno :3

Not certain what your gameplan is, though im here to play chess. 0-0

Turn 5a:
Agedcheez has responded with the legendary KINGSIDE CASTLE! time will tell how Solar reacts to this one!



Black to move.

Since there is now ample space above the farmland, I'd like to construct my barrack there. The lil' rabbit should be able to do that, according to the Chaos RTS handbook I got.

Turn 5b:
Solar's knight has constructed a barracks! Looks like the white team is getting in some very hot water now!



White to move,,,, unless :3c

Hmmm....
xd5

Turn 6a:
Huh. Apparently, the knight and the pawn both heard those orders agedcheez put out. No matter, they can share a square.



Black to move.

Turn 6a revision:
Oh. uh. I was wrong about algebraic notation. Sorry about that.



Black to move. again

(to be fair i also messed up my notation)